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Dear Beef Jerky Manufacturers,

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I am a stupid American, and so I often find myself shoveling your disgusting dried meat product into my face as I drive away from the grocery store. The necessary obliviousness inherent to this situation means that often times, I will throw items of similar texture and consistency into my mouth, as a show of faith in your quality control, of course. This brings me to the tiny plastic packet that lies inside your bag of jerky. I’m told that it holds magical properties of freshness for itself and anything that surrounds it. I’ve seen them in pill bottles too. Beef Jerky and Pills could be a Toby Keith song for sure! But I digress. I’m fairly certain that those little mother fuckers are poisonous…

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Unethical Ad Practices #1: Rodan + Fields

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Advertising standards have worried me deeply since I began working in internet marketing. I’m still rather green when it comes to the industry at large, but its not as if I was ever totally ignorant to the manipulation inherent to the many practices already in place when I joined the fray. Technology and intuition well outpace the current efforts to regulate bad behavior, privacy and general decency. I was very fortunate to start my career as a Training Specialist at an equitable firm, placing me in a somewhat central position to see the company workflow between sales, implementation, QA, and technical support. I got an unbiased view of how our clients would use our platform to run their campaigns, and the (sometimes) very minute difference…

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5 Important Consumer Advocates in the Games Industry

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** Note: This article will be constantly evolving as long as this site is active. Obviously, these are my opinions and readers are more than welcome to offer their 2 cents for future edits. *** This will be the first editorial piece for The SuperLuminal, and its subject matter is one of the main reasons I decided to build a site centered around the games industry. In my professional life, I am a contracted online advertising specialist with a strong focus on user friendly campaigns and optimization. In short, against all odds, I work in developing creative solutions to help publishers build profitable sites without pissing off their viewership. This is a near-impossible feat considering the cynicism of both the publishers and their viewers, so…

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Furi Review: Stranger in a Strange Land

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Developer: The Game Bakers Publisher: The Game Bakers Available on PC, PS4 (reviewed) Released: July 5, 2016 Hardcore games are not my bag. I have mentioned in earlier reviews that I’ve have played all of the Dark Souls games to completion without actually having much fun doing so. While I respect anyone with the patience and fortitude to make gaming a skill, I never saw it that way for myself. Games are supposed to be an escape from the stress and malaise of real life, like movies or a good book. This is why I’ve always enjoyed single player narratives most among the art form. I see games that require specific timing and precise movement as exercises in frustration. So why did I like Furi and its…

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Sausage Party- Pix“R”

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There are few movies that assault your sensibilities like Sausage Party, the new CGI animated feature by Seth Rogen and Evan Goldberg. For much of the film, I sat thinking, “what the fuck am I watching?” or “how was this allowed to be made?” I can’t remember thinking this about a positive movie-going experience since Team America: World Police in 2004. But that is part of what makes these movies so captivating: their audacity in the face of a whiny PC culture. It’s likely that a movie like this wouldn’t have been made without the comedy star power behind it. In fact, Rogen has said on numerous occasions that the script has been sitting on the shelf for the better part of a decade, waiting…

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Captain America: Civil War- Better than Batman v Superman. That’s what you needed to hear, right?

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I had to broach this subject with some objectivity. Sure, BvS was all I never wanted it to be, but it was still (and I’ll defend it forever) the best depiction of a broken Batman and contained a series of the best action events I’ve ever seen. Those of you who wish to suck the fun out of everything probably found it repugnant, but it was a spectacle for good or bad. Civil War is definitely the better movie if you find yourself scanning Netflix two years from now, and its because there has already been so much love dumped into RDJ and Chris Evans. These two ARE the focus of the movie, regardless of the other characters they force ham-handedly into the plot. Yes, we…

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Keanu Review – Word to the Turdness

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Keegan-Michal Key and Jordan Peele recently left a lucrative contract with Comedy Central on the table for their show “Key and Peele,” believing they had tapped that creative mine. It takes balls to leave a fat paycheck and a critically acclaimed show for what you may believe are greener pastures. In today’s entertainment climate, it might even seem foolhardy and arrogant to believe you have bigger and better things to move on to. K&P was arguably the best sketch show Comedy Central has offered since Chappelle’s Show, after all. However, it seems Key and Peele’s transition into movie making was justified with their feature release of Keanu. At its core, Keanu is about a guy named Rell (played by Peele) obsessively in love with a…

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Zootopia – Xoonophobia

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Disney rarely misses when fusing kid-friendly story lines with thoughtful adult concepts. Their latest animated movie, Zootopia, is no exception. With a relatable, predictably adorable cast of anthropomorphic characters, a contemporary setting involving social inequality, and a truly hilarious delivery, you’ll find it hard to harbor any cynicism towards this film. Believe me, I am well versed in the art of cynicism, and I had a big dorky grin on my face throughout the entire run time. Judy Hopps (Ginnifer Goodwin) is a rabbit from a small farming town with dreams of becoming a law enforcement officer in Zootopia, the metropolis built as a unifying location for both prey and predatory animals to live in harmony. This proves difficult for Judy, who has to deal…

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Firewatch Review – Hey There Delilah

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Developer: Campo Santo Publisher: Panic Available on PC, OSX, PS4 (reviewed) Released: February 9, 2016   For all the polarizing viewpoints that “walking simulators” have evoked over the past few years, I have been relatively indifferent to trying one out for myself. It wasn’t because I had any predispositions about them being boring, pretentious or unworthy of time; I was just always preoccupied with something else. Now because of this, I hesitate to call Firewatch a walking simulator purely because of my lack of background with them. However, we are forced to define them as video games without a win/loss model, interactive competition (AI or otherwise), or a goal other than reaching a narrative endpoint, then Firewatch can safely be called a walking simulator. But really, defining…

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